Theo. – In life, most people search for happiness. But happiness seems to be of a difficult and transient nature. Could we share on that topic?
The Elder – All the difficulty lies in combining a whole set of factors, so that, as a human being, we may attain personal fulfillment. We have already shared on the subject when we talked about the optimal experience. Happiness is a consequence, not a finality.
Theo. – Which factors do you mean?
The Elder – They are supposed to be the optimization and the integration of all the qualities a human being is a carrier of at all levels of the being.
Theo. – We have already approached that point when we talked about the autotelic person and the optimal experience.
The Elder – We have, but our finality is not about living one or several optimal experiences,; it is about becoming an optimal person. The difficulty lies in the fact that the being permanently exists. Experience opens up our consciousness, giving a taste for the direction that is offered to us.
Theo. – Is that the point where the soul enters your argument?
The Elder – We could just as well talk about the living force, which spurs us to go ahead, change and always evolve.
Taking a form is a way for the being to express itself; and anyway, that form is bound to disappear, sooner or later. As for our essential identity, it is eternal.
Theo. – Let us keep to the being’s psychology, shall we?
The Elder – OK. Human beings feel a need for transcendence, for wisdom, if they want to be happy under all circumstances. What matters is to set a goal for one’s existence. The goal creates a path that will allow an optimal experience with the contentment that goes with it. The goal will also provide the seeker with the energy needed for pursuing and illuminating the path: motivation, means and guidance.
Theo. – Choosing a proper goal for one’s life is important.
The Elder – The goal you set gives meaning to your life and makes it be positive.
Theo. – Could you give an example of it?
The Elder – We must all give our lives a meaningful purpose. I, for certain, have chosen the Ultimate. It is the highest goal a human being can attain, as it integrates all the plans and levels of an existence, but it could also be quite another goal. Our deeper self knows what it wants.
Theo. – And you propose meditating on the heart as a means to get in touch with the Self, don’t you?
The Elder – It is the best way I know. The heart will always give the right answers. You will never regret having listened to it.
Theo. – Is it enough for us to achieve our objectives, our goal in life?
The Elder – It is the very first step. The second one consists in acquiring the capacities to achieve what has emerged within our selves.
Theo. – Do you mean that we must learn, study?
The Elder – Of course we must, in order to acquire the skills, the capacities, and that is a life–long learning, believe me.
Theo. – So, there is a combination of know–how and learning–to–be.
The Elder – We must get the balance right between our personal challenges and our capacities, if we want to partake in an optimal experience. Such a right balance is what a trainer must help his disciple to reach. An optimal experience requires high level challenges and capacities. And what do you think will happen if a due proportion is not observed?
Theo. – That’s what I had to go through, when I was at school. Whenever the challenge was too high, then I would worry and become anxious.
The Elder – What would you do then?
Theo. – Then I would work hard acquiring some skills, which made me feel better. Some of my friends, who were over–gifted, used to get bored, at school. Now I can understand that the challenges were not tailor–made for them. But there were also those who felt overwhelmed, or even crushed. Then they would be either anxious or they would start heckling, thus disturbing the whole class and making a mess of it.
The Elder (laughing)
– It is a healthy response, meant to make sure you can survive when in hostile environments. That is the reason why I promote listening to the heart when confronted to being formatted for an education based on normative statements.
Theo. – Here is the revolutionary spirit in you, isn’t?
The Elder – The Taoist spirit, maybe. An individual willingly accepts constraints, provided they comply with his or her inner values.
Theo. – But what if we haven’t got any?
The Elder – That is the parents’ and teachers’ main role: fostering the emergence of the child’s qualities. They will give him or her the capacity and the fantastic force required to go ahead.
Theo. – But can’t a child also have weaknesses?
The Elder – It is also the teachers’ role to alleviate the weaknesses and obstacles the child has to face. The teachers must value the child’s qualities, while showing him or her how effort can be gratifying and productive. Laxity and laziness do not belong in a non–doing attitude.
Theophile the Elder
An excerpt from Dialogues with Theophile the Elder
Theophile the Younger’s initiation